Trickle Down (Mom)enomics

I'm back and I'm in a hurry to write this because I'm basically in a hurry to do everything these days. I guess it's just that time of year. So much going on and this year, it is compounded by the fact that my dear hubby got an amazing promotion (thank you, God) and is also in the middle of back to back turnarounds, so he is working really long and totally random hours. We see each other in passing and this will continue until after the New Year. We are making it work and the kids are transitioning okay but we all miss him and our (sort of) normal routine. It is hard for them but I'm realizing more and more as I gain experience as a mother and wife that when it comes to the family vibe...I set the tone.

Hear me out. I've had a lot of time to think about this, experiment with it and the evidence bears me out. Most of the time, when I'm calm, cool and collected, everyone in the house seems to line up with my mood. Conversely, If I'm not careful, I can send the whole clan out into their various daily lives in a stressed out, bummed out or frustrated mood simply because I fail to exercise a little self control. I'll give you an example, though it's not flattering to me, personally and is a bit embarrassing. In the spirit of mom unity and all that, I'll go ahead and put myself 'out there.'

Last week, I woke up feeling awful. My knee was hurting, I fell asleep too late, while reading, and hadn't taken my contacts out, so my eyes were dry and blurry. David was still not home from work and I allowed myself to become resentful that I had to get the kids up, fed, dressed and driven off to school (earlier than usual that day) without any help. This was particularly stupid because David is rarely here in the mornings anyway and I am perfectly capable of doing all of those things, as I always do, by myself. Besides, my kids are really compliant and generally in a good mood when they wake up, so getting  them to school is no big deal. Usually, it's my pleasure. Actually...it's my JOB.

But on this day, I was NOT in the mood. I walked into the family room and immediately began finding fault. Clothes not picked up, the kids weren't moving fast enough for me. The dog wanted out and then in and then out again. There was no food in the dog's bowl. I began grumbling purposefully loud enough to hear that I was sick and tired of having to do EVERYTHING and that I was going to start grounding them from electronics for leaving their stuff out and I was not their maid and I was nobody's personal servant and what about personal responsibility and accountability and disrespect, blah, blah, blah...I mean, I was on a roll, y'all!! I was riding them like a jockey at the Kentucky Derby. Totally out of character for me and completely unnecessary. But you moms out there will relate that once we get started like that, it's like a snowball going downhill. The momentum is too much and all of our pent up frustration comes to the surface and then before you know it, you're anger jumps out of the gate and it's off to the races. I'm ashamed to admit that I kept this up all the way to the school drop off lines. And believe me, I was justified. I was fired up with righteous indignation. I had had it.

Nothing I was saying was wrong. I had legitimate complaints. But wow, was my timing and delivery way off. My kids are sensitive and eager to please. They were sleepy and had just woken up. They are used to laughing and giggling and kisses and prayers in the morning. Talk about a blindside. The two little ones were holding back tears and sniffling and Patrick just looked shell shocked. I dropped them off and drove home still juiced up with aggravation. It wasn't until I walked back into my quiet house, mess and all, that I realized the damage I had done. Too late. At that point there was nothing I could do about it but wait until I picked them up and try to gently explain and apologize. After I had time to reflect, I realized that the whole thing was my own fault. That morning, I had become so self centered that I bypassed my usual 'Good morning. Lord...thank you for this new day' and jumped right into "poor me mode." I forgot to put God first. I zoomed in on my inconveniences and failed to take a moment to just be grateful for a new day. That's not like me but I'm human and have weak moments just like everyone else. I felt contrite and regretful all day. I asked God to forgive me but I couldn't wait to see my kids to ask for theirs, as well.

As parents, I think it is vital to openly admit our mistakes to our kids and to ask their forgiveness. THAT is how they learn accountability and personal responsibility. By modeling what they see us doing with them and with others in our lives. When I'm wrong, I say I'm wrong. I don't try to be perfect in their eyes. I just want to give them my best. Sometimes my best isn't all that great but at least they see me trying and learning and growing. I feel like that's a good lesson. That no matter our age or position, we should be accountable for all that we say and do at all times. Also, that regardless of who we are or how old we may be, we are (hopefully) always learning and growing.

When I saw them that afternoon, all of my kids were noticeably a little wary and even a bit distant with me. I don't blame them. During our conversation when we got home, Patrick threw a truth bomb at me that I will never, ever forget. He said, "Mom, I  like the way we usually have fun in the mornings because I think that's a special time for us. Not all kids have moms that are fun like you. When you are griping and mad in the morning, it just ruins my whole day. I mean...you didn't even pray with us this morning. I prayed for you when I got to school that you would stop being mad at us."

Boom. We all talked it out and I was able to articulate my expectations with them and they forgave me for being a raving witch. Although it ended well, I'm left with a lesson I'll keep with me always.

Since that a-ha morning...I've made a commitment to myself to do a little mental inventory before I even open my bedroom door to be about the business of my day. I'll give Jesus His due, as the first greeting I give in the morning belongs to Him. I'll think about how I'm feeling. If I'm annoyed because I stayed up too late, I'll shake it off and tell myself to deal with it. I'll greet my husband and kids with a hug and a smile. I will gently but firmly nudge them in the direction they should go. I will do my job and set the proper tone for the day. I will encourage, uplift and pray with them as we part for the day. There will be plenty of time for reinforcing behavior and unless one of the kids is being a total pain and I have to deal with it (it happens), we will greet the day as positively as possible. That is on me. Why me? Because I am the grown up, I am the mom and wife, and whether I understand why or not...it's my responsibility to set the tone in my household. The tone I choose is peaceful, calm, patient and loving. With God's mercy and grace...I can at least do that. Call it 'trickle down Momenomics.'

Will I get this right every day? Probably not but I'm determined and usually that means I will succeed. When I do slip up, I'll own it, apologize for it and ask for a do-over. Sounds a lot like life, I guess. Thankfully, I know that to err is human and to forgive is divine.

I'm grateful for divine forgiveness and also deeply humbled and thankful for the unconditional love and understanding from my best friend and husband and our darling little humans who are growing up way too fast. :)

Happy Thanksgiving to all. 

Blessings and love,

~Cat

The Power, Perks and Perils of Being a Girl...An Open Letter to my Daughter

Hello, sweet girl.

As I am writing this, you are sitting in your 4th grade classroom with your sassy 9 year old self and I am sitting here, smiling to myself thinking about you. Last night on the way home from gymnastics, we were giggling until we were snorting and helpless with laughter. You had me rolling. One day, when you are older, you will understand why I call such exchanges 'freeze frame moments.' There are those special experiences that we share when there is so much joy, just in the loving of you, that I wish time would stand still and I could just bask in the feelings and intimate emotions shared by just the two of us. You are a rare and precious gem. A pearl of great price. A source of wonder to me and conversely, sometimes a serious pain in the rump and a thorn in my side, as I'm sure I am in yours. That is just as it should be, of course. This is the way with mothers and daughters.

I wish that you would always see yourself through the eyes of your Daddy and me. I pray that you will carry the self confidence and sense of self that you have right now all the way through your childhood, teenage years and into adulthood. Unfortunately, I am honest enough with myself to know what the odds are of that and I have concerns. There will be speed bumps and hairpin turns in the road ahead. I want you to be prepared but not overwhelmed. I want you to dream big but be ready for the inevitable disappointments. I want you to be compassionate and caring to others without getting lost in the shuffle. I want you to be able to discern real love from false affections. I want so much for you. Mostly, I want my own experiences, mistakes and unfortunate choices to be the bridge you use to carry you above the turbulent waters and guide you safely over the same pitfalls that we all encounter along the way.

Honey, the world will often look at you through narrowed, steely eyes of judgment, jealousy and predatory opportunism. It will whisper deceiving, accusing seeds of thought that, if nurtured or allowed to implant, will multiply and crowd out reason and truth. You must be vigilant in your thought life. Whatever is true, whatever is good, whatever is holy, whatever is loving and peaceful and humble...stay focused on. Any thoughts of failure, unworthiness, hatefulness, envy, false pride, or of being alone are to be removed by the root and cast aside like the garbage that it is. Remember who you are. Remember whose you are.

You will make mistakes. You will have lapses in judgement that will lead to consequences. Be ready for that and be ready to take responsibility for your actions and to be accountable for your wrong doings. Apologize quickly and forgive easily, even if others are not mature enough to do the same. There are a lot of lost and hurting souls walking around in this world. They may hurt you or betray you. Don't take it personally. 99% of the time, the actions of others toward you really have nothing to do with you. It is about their own issues. Don't feel you must carry the burdens of others. You were not designed to be an emotional pack mule for everyone around you.. Be loving and pray, help within your own capabilities and give the rest to God. He's bigger, stronger and has way more wisdom than you (and me, for that matter...) please learn to let Him do the heavy lifting.

There will be a lot of other girls/women out there who will tell you that you "deserve" to be treated as an equal to your male counterparts. That men and women are actually equal. This is simply NOT SO.

Anyone with a basic grasp of biology and anatomy will realize the inequalities of the sexes and not bemoan them but celebrate them!  This is why we need each other. We were created to be in partnership and relationship with one another based on love and respect and our mutual interests and beliefs. A healthy relationship is not founded on competition. I've never seen one of those that ended well. That is not to say that you don't deserve to have the same RIGHTS. Totally different issue. Don't allow anyone to confuse you about this. It will lead you on a quest for something which is ultimately unattainable and will lead you in circles. You are a girl. You have power in your own right. Don't waste your time trying to prove yourself or your value to anyone. If they don't want or are unable to see and appreciate your fabulousness...just politely move along.

Here's the big one. We've already established that you are loved, smart, beautiful, worthy and are filled with limitless potential. Period. Since we know that, I want you to listen carefully to me here...You do NOT need a boy/man to pay attention to you in order to validate any of the things I mentioned above. There are good guys out there. There are some not-so-good ones out there as well. Both types will look to you for guidance on how to treat you. I'm going to repeat this because it is SO IMPORTANT. If you respect yourself, your faith and commitment to God, your body, your values and your beliefs, you will be respected in return. You will filter out the undesirables by letting them know you are not an easy target. Respect yourself ALL THE TIME. Especially when it comes to taking photos, or posting things about yourself on social media that do not line up completely with who you really are. Be vigilant and behave. One mistake in this area can create a huge ripple in the sea of your life that is vast and far reaching. Once spoken, something cannot be unspoken. What is seen cannot be unseen. Remember that wherever you are, whatever you are doing. One moment of indiscretion can lead to some serious regrets. You don't want to deal with that. Make it easy on yourself. Carry yourself with respect, dignity, integrity and represent your family and Jesus well.

One other thing...Your father and I will always be your soft place to fall. We will love you in spite of any mistakes you might make. As a family, united in love for each other and bonded together by the blessing and love of almighty God, there is nothing we cannot overcome. Nothing. Come to us confident in the knowledge that nothing can separate you from that love and mercy. Also be confident that we will use WHATEVER means necessary to protect and guide you in the way that you should go. This may include invading your privacy, telling you the truth, (even if it hurts), popping up unexpectedly wherever you tell us you may be, taking away your phone, car, privileges and other things that you value in order to keep you on the right path. We are willing to risk your anger to keep you safe. We are friendly with you. We are not your FRIENDS. We are your parents and it is our profound duty and obligation to protect you from anything or anyone that may do you harm. Even yourself. We are completely unyielding in this area. Save us all a lot of heartache and drama by abiding by the rules and respecting yourself, the authority of your parents, your brothers, your friends and others placed in your life. Remember that if we didn't love you so much, we wouldn't bother to care so much about these things.

As your Grandaddy (my Daddy) used to say: Stay close to Jesus and don't waste energy trying to make sense out of nonsense. I often wonder how my earlier years would have turned out if I had heeded his advice a little sooner. The truth is, I made a lot of mistakes and mischief. Somehow, God was able to turn it all around and give me beauty for my ashes. That beauty is you, my love. You are beautiful. Your soul is beautiful. You are treasured and I honor you for the amazing little girl that you are and look forward to enjoying the amazing woman you will become. Stand strong on that unbreakable foundation of love. You have the royal blood of the King of the universe flowing through you. You are destined for greatness and are ever my powerful little princess...

Matelaine of Kingsbury.

These are the words to the lullaby I used to sing to you as I rocked you in my arms or knelt by your bed side as you slipped off to sleep:

You came into our lives one day.

Right then, we fell in love...

A little girl to love so much,

Our baby's gentle touch...

Mattie Noelle, Mattie Noelle

You were sent from heaven up above.

Mattie Noelle, we hope you can tell...

Just how much you fill our hears with love.

Our Mattie Noelle.

I love you forever, baby girl.

Love,

Your Mama


Please watch this to remember WHO YOU ARE!

Steve Crawford Changed My Life. Here's How:...and here's what I want YOU to do about it....

Hi, Everyone.

 

If you don't already know of Steve Crawford, allow me to get you up to speed. He is one of the worship leaders at Lakewood Church. He is a ridiculously talented singer and musician. He and his equally ridiculously talented sister Da'dra Greathouse are the leaders of the Lakewood Worship Team which I am humbly honored to be a member of and serve with. Both of them are wonderful and I love them both very much. Today, I want to single out Steve. 

 

Steve Crawford

 

This will make him uncomfortable and a little embarrassed because even though he is incredibly gifted and is quite well known, and sings in front of sold out stadiums all over the world as he travels with Joel Osteen Ministries, he's shy and refreshingly full of boyish charm and has a huge heart for God who he serves with humility, reverence, honesty and, quite frankly, a lot of man hours and personal sacrifice. Lots of self confidence. Zero arrogance or ego. I mean, zip. He's a regular guy and wants to be treated as such. Just a few of the reasons why he's so well loved and respected by those who know him.

 

I first saw Steve Crawford on the platform at Lakewood Church one Sunday during our family's first visit there several years ago. Like everyone else who hears him sing...I was blown away. Not only by his voice (as I said...ridiculous) but by his powerful heart of worship. Watching Steve praise and worship makes people go: "Wow...He's totally in the presence of God. Man...I'll have what he's having." It had a profound impact on me that day. (Still does, even now). I was like..."Who is this guy?" Honestly, I'd never seen or heard of him or of Da'dra before. Probably because in the churches I attended before...people just didn't do praise and worship like that!

 

 

Boy, was I missing out. Well, I've definitely made up for lost time during the last few years! Check out this video of Steve (and the rest of us...I'm on the far right of the screen, can't see me until the very end...) in action, getting our praise on at Lakewood Church).

Turns out, Steve and his sister have been singing gospel in churches since they were knee-high to a grasshopper. They also formed the group 'Anointed' and have performed in front of some pretty influential people over the years and have received accolades, honors and awards galore. The list is long and impressive but I won't go into all of that here because I want you to see his links below and go check out his Facebook and website, etc. for yourselves and really get to know him. You won't regret it.

Over the last several years, Steve, in word and in deed, has HUGELY transformed and increased my faith walk and relationship with God. He is an amazing mentor, teacher, brother and friend. I am one of the blessed people out there who can say, "Steve Crawford loves me and I get to love him, too." He and his wife, Tammy are family to us. They have three amazing kids that they are excellent parents to. As you can see...I can't say enough good things about Steve but if he was here I know he would tell me to stop it, already. He's sweet and humble like that.

 

I will tell you only this much more...that this man has profoundly changed my life forever for the better by his example and selfless love and I want to bless him. And I want YOU to, as well. Today I am making a generous donation to his new solo project because I believe in him and I want others to benefit from what he has to share with believers and lovers of praise and worship music all over the world! There's no telling who his voice will touch or whose lives will be changed. Here's how you can help: Please give generously as he so generously gives of himself to others. THANK YOU!!

Blessings,
~Cat

 

From Steve:


Dear Family and Friends,

I have started a fundraising campaign on Kickstarter.com to raise money to fund my
first debut solo project. Kickstarter.com is a crowd-funding site, which allows individuals to support, by donations, to various projects. This is how it works:

Once you sign up on www.kickstarter.com, you be able to click the amount you are willing to pledge to support the project. Each pledge amount will have certain incentives that I am offering as an expression of my gratitude. There is a set time frame, (in my case is 21 days), in which to raise the money and reach my goal of $35,000. When the goal is met, at that point, the money pledged will then be transferred. (I am believing for this). Also any excess will still be applied toward further promotion for the project.

However, if the goal is not met within the allotted days, then the funds will not be transferred from the pledgers and the project will not be funded. At this point, I will be praying for another way to accomplish this vision. 


So, the Kickstarter fundraising campaign has begun and I am asking all of my family and
friends to please help me make this dream come true. It's amazing how much can be
accomplished with many. So, in advance I thank you.

I will be communicating through the social media outlets mentioned below with more
highlights on the status of campaign as well as updates.

I want to thank you so much for your help. Please help me spread the word. Feel free to forward this message to your family and friends.

Remember, no amount is too small or too large. Every donation is greatly appreciated. 

Sincerely,

Steve Crawford


2910 Commercial Ctr Blvd.
Suite 103
Katy, Texas 77494


Website: www.stevecrawford.cc


Facebook: www.facebook.com/ImSteveCrawford


Twitter: www.twitter.com/imstevecrawford



Steve Crawford's Solo Project Update !!!!!


Hello everyone,

I wanted to give you an update on the campaign for the project.

We have 61 backers as of today totally donations of $9,572.00.

With 21 days left we still have $25,428 to go. That's all. LOL.

Thanks to all who have contributed. Please help me get the word out!!!

I really need your help. Thank you all!!!



Copy and paste or click on URL:http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1959319832/steve-crawfords-first-debut-cd

God bless you,

Steve Crawford

 

Unpacking Your Baggage

On The Wharf in Boothbay Harbor, ME

Well, we just returned from our family vacation in Maine and I'm feeling the usual post-vacation blues. I always say, "I need one more week." Wouldn't matter how many weeks I was there, either. I'll always want one more week of Maine. If you ever have the opportunity to vacation in coastal Maine (preferably the Boothbay Harbor region http://boothbayharbor.com) DO IT! You won't regret it. It is my absolute favorite place on the planet. It is the one place I can really let down and relax, which is saying a lot since (as most of you already know) I basically have the nervous system of a Chihuahua.

 

But, as they say, all good things must come to an end. Why do you suppose 'they' say that? And who are 'they' anyway? 'They' annoy me with that phrase. I want the good stuff to go on and on, don't you? Alright...where was I? Oh, yeah...the post vacation let-down. Listen, my absolute least favorite thing to do is unpack and put away all of the stuff I spent days (and really late nights) excitedly getting together and sorting and organizing in anticipation of an upcoming trip. This time, with the help of a friend, I even washed everything while still on vacation in order to avoid piles of laundry when I got home. I had big plans to be all done unpacking the very first day I got home. The result of all of that work is that, although I did put away two suitcases worth of stuff, I ran out of steam pretty early on and now have quite a few clean piles of laundry left in inconvenient places to put away. I've gotta be honest...I'm tired and I'm not feelin' it right now. Such is life.

Seanook Cottage, East Boothbay, ME

 

 

At the check-in counter at the airport, I was that lady who had overstuffed a giant suitcase and was over the 50lb weight limit. My calm and collected hubby never batted an eye as he opened my bag and began pulling out my personal belongings (in full view of the  several openly hostile passengers in line behind us) in an attempt to distribute the weight evenly between our other bags. I stood helpfully by, with my hand covering my face in acute embarrassment nodding my approval as he pulled out item after item, hair spray, de-frizzing hair serum, blow drying heat protectant, etc. to be inspected for their potential transfer to another suitcase. I had done it again. Very carefully and thoughtfully packed TWICE AS MUCH stuff as I would need for the trip. And not just for myself, either. I packed way too much for all of us. Looking back at my preparations I can only ask myself in astonishment: "What was I thinking?" Where, in the dark recesses of my mind, did I think I was going to wear three different pairs of black dress pants to a place where we spend the majority of our time hiking, in a boat or climbing on rocks? Temporary insanity is the only explanation. Happens every time. I start with the minimum items I'll need and then I start seeing stuff that I feel I can't possibly do without and then it all spirals out of control from there. Here is a perfect visual aid that depicts precisely what happens to my brain during the process of packing for a trip: Especially at about 1:50... 

 

 

"That's all I need." lol

 

As with everything else, I see this as a metaphor for life. We all do this and I'm as guilty as anyone else. We drag around too much unnecessary baggage. Stuff we can totally do without. Personal items that clutter our lives. Emotions and past resentments. Unforgiveness. Guilt. Shame. Blame. Even certain people. Boom.

 

This humiliating moment at the airport check-in~. And yes, I'll admit publicly that despite my efforts to the contrary, I did the exact same thing on the way home, too...(Well...can I help it if Maine has a lot of pretty rocks we just couldn't live without? I mean, besides the ones we boxed up and mailed home...and no, I'm not kidding)~

Saying goodbye to Ocean Point

 really serves as a reminder that I need to make an effort to do some serious unpacking of the baggage of my life. There are a lot of things I can most definitely live without. Would actually live better without! I'm going to get started on that just as soon as I unpack my literal baggage from our vacation. I really intend to reduce the inventory around here. It will be so great. I can just feel the weight lifting off of me already.

 

But of course I'm totally keeping the rocks. Those are super important souvenirs of our amazing trip! And the dress pants. I mean...a girl can't have too many pairs of nice, black dress pants. And my hair care products, too because my hair has to look nice, you know, being that I'm a Texas girl and whatnot... but really, that's all I need...

 

 

 

Blessings,

 

~Cat

 

 

Who's Your Daddy?

There's no point in me buying a ticket and trying to win the lottery. The odds are stacked against me winning big again since I've hit the jackpot in the marriage department. Today marks my 16 year wedding anniversary. Wow. Hard to believe it's been that long. On one hand, it feels like only yesterday that David and I and fell in like and inevitably in love. Then again...it's hard to remember my life without him in it. I sometimes feel like my life really began in earnest on the day I met him. It was like living a two dimensional existence and then being thrust into the vividness and texture of the three dimensional life experience. Knowing and loving David has fundamentally changed me for the better. He is my favorite grown up and the best friend I have ever known. He is my hero and my sidekick all rolled in to one. He is my loyal confidante, my sounding board and an excellent snuggle partner. Simply: He is the love of my life. 

 

I had him all to myself for seven amazing years and then, thousands of prayers and tears and one miracle later, we became parents to a beautiful little brown-eyed boy who, in our eyes, was perfect in every way. Patrick changed our lives overnight and then when our precious twins, Mattie and Michael were born 2 1/2 years later, we were so delighted and thankful for our three healthy babies but man...at times we were like sleep deprived  zombies, bumping into each other occasionally on the way to change a diaper or burp a baby (or two). It has been an amazing blur of a ride ever since. Becoming a mother was such a deliciously mind-blowing experience. But for me, the best part has been observing the  transformation of my husband into the father that he is today. I've often said that if every child had a daddy like David, the world would be forever changed for the better. He's inspiring like that. I've told him he should write a book with his advice on how to be a loving and successful husband and father while managing a successful career. I know it would sell millions of copies. He would never have to work again. (But he would, anyway!)

 

Want to know why I say that? I say it because it's true and everyone who knows David would totally back me up on this one. He's a great dad because his toughest critics, his own kids, all say so. I just asked Michael to give me some words to describe his dad. He went on and on so I'll have to give you the short list: Fun, super-fun, kind, caring, quiet, dependable, hard working, cool, loving, strong and perfect. Quite the rave review, wouldn't you say? I happen to agree with Michael. He is all of those things. And more, although 'perfect' may be pushing it just a smidge. I mean...let's not get carried away, here, right?  :)

When I was Michael's age, my dad made rare, unexpected and whirlwind appearances into my life. It was awesome when he came around, don't get me wrong...but he was not a consistent presence in our lives. People would ask me, "Who's your daddy?" and I would have to say "you wouldn't know him. He's not from here. He doesn't live with us. I hated that. He always made me feel loved and treasured but then he was gone again. It often seemed like important pieces of my puzzle were missing. I never could quite put myself together again completely. I vowed to myself that when I had children, they would never feel that way. Incomplete. Not if I could help it. Thanks to my husband, when people ask my kids, "Who's your daddy?' They can answer with certainty and confidence that their daddy is their role model, their football coach, their mentor, their nerf-gun battle captain and teammate, their fishing partner, their counselor, their hard working, selfless provider, the magic mender of their hearts and hurts and countless other things I don't have room to list...the most important being: Loving, supportive and loyal husband to their mother.

 

I'm not naïve enough to believe that because of all the love, sacrifice, dedication, discipline and affection lavished upon my children by David and I, that they will automatically all turn out to be doctors or teachers or scientists or pastors or Olympic gymnasts or whatever, who never stray from the path and who always stay away from people or behaviors that might harm them. I know life doesn't work that way. They will mess up. Poor choices will be made. I will ceaselessly pray for them and try to train them up in the way they should go and then eventually, grudgingly and probably with much hand wringing and weeping, let them go out into the world and become who God has destined them to be. I believe and declare that my children will be mighty in the land. If they follow in their dad's footsteps, they will be headed in the right direction and will not depart from it.

 

My husband provides all of us with daily encouragement, daily prayer and the security of knowing that no matter what the world may throw at us, when it's all said and done, he is our firm foundation and our soft place to fall. He is the best of the very best of dads and we are exceedingly proud of him.

 

David from all of us, we wish you a happy and blessed Father's Day. We honor you and we love you with all of our hearts. Thank you for always being there even when you don't feel like it and thank you for never complaining or raising your voice when you do feel like it. We all believe in you and can't wait to see what great things you will accomplish next and are cheering you on every step of the way!

 

All our love, forever and then some...

 

Catherine, Patrick, Mattie, Michael

& Sparky

 

 

Looking After Each Other

"May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had, so that with one mind and one voice you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ." ~Romans 15:5-6

Today I was just minding my own business scrolling around on Facebook and checking my blog when I ran into the scripture listed above. I really wasn't planning on writing a blog post today because I have a lot going on and a to-do list as long as my arm. But this scripture gave me pause because it is one I've seen and read and thought about a little but today it was like reading it anew. The original thought behind it to me was, to put it in layman's terms, look after each other and encourage the people in your life. To have each other's backs, as it were. More or less.

Well, as it turns out, there is more. Much more that I have been overlooking and I wanted to share it with you, even though you are probably much wiser than I, and you've probably already figured all of this out for yourself. Still, I think it is so amazing that I can read or hear a scripture and get something new out of it in different seasons of my life. Kind of like that special bubble gum From Willie Wonka where you can chew the same piece of gum but get all kinds of different flavors out of it depending on your mood or desire. Kind of a weird comparison, I know, but as you have likely surmised by now...I'm a little weird. Stay with me anyway.

So, yesterday...another scripture crossed my path which was this:

"Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many."
~Hebrews 12:15

Sort of similar messages, right? The words that stick out for me in these two scriptures right off the bat are: 'look after each other' and 'watch out' and 'toward each other.' Doesn't take a brain surgeon to see what we are called to do. We are supposed to be taking care of each other. Loving our neighbor as ourselves. Doing unto others as we would have them do unto us. Being a friend who sticks closer than a brother, etc. The first scripture tells us to encourage each other so that we may have endurance to run this so-called race of life.

The way I see it, the instructions are pretty specific. We are to do this with a Christ-like attitude...and here's the kicker: We are to be of one mind. One voice. The ultimate purpose of which is to glorify God. As God gives grace to us so freely, we are to spread it around unselfishly and unreservedly so that as ONE BODY, we reflect and glorify the love of God. I just love that. That is our purpose as believers. Our calling. Simply to love and serve one another in order to emulate the character and image of our creator, almighty God who is LOVE. Goosebumps.

But we have to be careful, don't we? There is a warning there. We have to watch out that we do not allow bitterness to take root in us. Why? Because a bitter root produces bitter fruit. Because as one body, one mind, one voice...we are contagious to one another. The scripture says that bitterness may grow to trouble you but it will end up corrupting many. We are all connected. Just as our joy and laughter can be infectious, so can our bitterness and criticisms.

As I write this today, I realize how important it really is, what a huge responsibility and privilege it is...to be the hands and feet of Jesus. To keep 'washing' those hands and feet in the word of God, so that I will not contaminate others with my own negative stuff. I don't want to be a carrier of sin or a transmitter of hate. My desire is to carry the communicable, joyous, totally transmittable good news of Christ's salvation to every heart and mind I come in contact with.

I want you all to know that I will continue to encourage you every chance I get. Keep running your race. I've got your back as I hope you have mine. Don't get discouraged because as you know...if you've read to the end of The Book ...WE WIN. Glory to God!

I'm really grateful for this revelation and I wanted to pass it along to you. I hope and believe it will bear good, life-giving fruit. All my love to all of you.

Blessings,
~Cat

A Healthy Dose of Humility

I'm going to come right out and say it. Growing up up in an abusive household doesn't make me special. If it did most of us would think pretty highly of ourselves. It surely doesn't entitle me to extra sympathy or special attention from anyone. To beat a tired, over-used phrase...'it is what it is.' By the grace of God, I have overcome so much and have grown to recognize that triumph out of tragedy is a recurring theme God has used since the dawn of time to show Himself great in this world. With humility, I will say that the course my life illustrates that attribute of God's character perfectly. Humility. Such an important word that is somewhat lacking in our modern discourse. It is a quality that I strive for in my own life but occasionally...I fall short. And by occasionally, of course I mean daily.

They didn't talk to me much about humility when I was growing up but I was put down and dismissed quite frequently. That is what I thought humility meant. To be humiliated. I knew that feeling quite well. I was raised by very self-centered, self serving people. I mean no disrespect when I say that. I'm just being honest. The adults in my life (my mom and step-dad mostly) seemed to believe that children were bothersome and intrusive and were annoyances to be dealt with in whatever manner they deemed appropriate to what their mood was at the time. This is not to say I was not loved. I was. They did the best they could, I suppose. My dad loved me very much. Just never seemed to be able to stick around for long periods at a time.

I'd describe my life growing up sort of like being in a climate where volatile and violent changes in the weather patterns would take place constantly. Hard to know how to gear up appropriately day by day. I became a human barometer. My internal dialogue became something like "Prepare for the worst, expect heavy weather and remember to really enjoy the sunshine while it lasts."  I became both self protective and fiercely protective of others around me. It also created an unhealthy tendency to crave peace at any price, the end result being self taught to become a chronic people pleaser. This looks like humility on the surface but is really selfishness In disguise. ie: (If I can keep everybody happy and ok, I will feel better and safe and will have some semblance of control over my own environment). I know. That's deep, isn't it?
 

Fortunately, God has placed people in my path along the way that helped me to discover that I was not living on a hostile planet, so to speak. Aunts, uncles, amazing and loving grandparents and great- grandparents, even parents of my friends, who lavished love on me and gave me a glimpse of what a peaceful, loving home should feel like. People who put the needs of others before their own. True humility. I was determined that when the time came, I would never settle for anything less for my own children. And I haven't settled. My children live in a peaceful (most days), loving and God-centered, spirit-filled home. We are not perfect. We are messy and we are extremely goofy. We work together but mostly play together. We pray together. We enjoy each other. We like to hang out in our pajamas and be lazy together. My family works. We are functional. That, in and of itself, is a triumph of great magnitude in my eyes. Humbling, to say the least.

 

As parents, sometimes we swing too far in the opposite direction of our pain and try to build up our kids' self esteem, (which I believe to be vitally important, by the way), and we try to protect their egos too much. I've been guilty of this. But in a society of swagger and celebrity worship and 'me-ism' I have been trying to redirect my children's focus from themselves and their own desires onto God and to the needs of others. This requires vigilance on my part and I have been praying for direction in this area. There are teachable moments around every corner. The challenge? Recognizing and making the most of them. On this, I'm not willing to settle, either. I tell my kids every single day as they get out of the car to go to school:

"God loves you and I love you. You can do ALL things through Christ, who strengthens you. Now...go do great things with this day and be a blessing, not a burden to those God places in your path."

I get an occasional eyeroll and sometimes they say it along with me in a little sing-song voice but I don't let that stop me. I'm sowing precious seeds into this garden we call life and I intend to nurture them and care for them until we reap an amazing harvest. I declare our children will be mighty in the land. In order for that to take place, we must surrender, be obedient, trust in God's will for our lives and let our faith sustain us through the process. As for me and my house? We will serve the Lord. By His grace, we will serve him with a healthy dose of humility!

This verse says it all:

Philippians 2:3-11
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore also God highly exalted Him, and bestowed on Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those who are in heaven, and on earth, and under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Speaking of teachable moments...we are watching The Bible series on the History Channel as a family. It has opened up incredible dialogue about so many biblical and general life topics. The kids even asked to watch it over again last night. I recommend this series (but not for younger viewers, as it has violent scenes, as you might expect) and we are all looking forward to upcoming episodes which air every Sunday night until the finale on Easter Sunday. My kids are getting out their Bibles to see what book the show is on and I've learned quite a bit myself. It is condensed, so we have to pause occasionally to get everyone up to speed, but overall it has been a great family experience so far. I'll share the link with you so you can get the details for yourselves.***

http://thebibleminiseries.com/

Blessings,

~Cat