Friday, August 5, 2011

God Uses Cheap Trick To Get My Attention

As most of you know, last week was very challenging for our family. Strep hit us and hit us hard. One of my girlfriends jokingly said "you Kingsburys are dropping like flies!" It started with Patrick on Thursday and one after the other of us came down with strep. I was in over my head. My oldest, Patrick had both pneumonia and strep and I was concerned about his cough. I felt just awful. Michael is so little and seems so vulnerable and was still recovering from a bout of pneumonia himself. Mattie's fevers were hovering around 102 or above even with meds. David was doing what David does. Working hard, long hours. When he got home, tired from work, he unselfishly did his best to get us what we needed. Rough stuff.

You know, when I started this blog, I promised myself I would be as transparent with you all (and with myself) as I could be while still preserving the privacy and intimacy of my family. Sometimes that's hard. I'd like to tell you that throughout this last week I stayed in faith and was constantly at peace because I know that God is my healer and my protector. I'd like to say that I was strong in the Lord and the power of His might. I'd like to say that I invited Him into the situation and trusted  Him to have His way. Problem is, that would be a big fat lie. Yes, I prayed. I prayed AT God. I said all the right words in those prayers. I know how to use all the right words. I told God what I expected of Him. I told Him what His promises were with regard to my family's health and well being. But, you know...my heart just wasn't in it. I was tired, frustrated, sick and overwhelmed and I just wasn't FEELING Him. That is foreign to me. The not feeling Him. Jesus and I, well, we're close. So I confess I felt a little sorry for myself. Okay, I stumbled directly into the Pit of Pity. And I hung out and wallowed there for a bit. Until my fingers got all pruny. No, I'm not proud of that but it is what it is.

I'll let you in on something...sometimes people at church and other Christian friends amaze me with their seemingly perfect faith. I really admire that. I mean, I consider myself a person of strong faith, but I have my moments, ya'll. Usually, I keep my chin up and keep a smile on my face as I soldier on. Last week, though, I certainly had some pretty low moments. There is something important to note here: During the whole ordeal I knew in the back of my mind that God would never let me go. And He never did. It was me. I let Him go. I walked right out of His grace and into my own flesh and allowed the distance between us. All my fault. It could have been different and God willing it will be different if (rather, when) the next trial comes along. Thanks to God's mercy and love, I will get a do-over. He's so awesome that way.

Here's where it gets kind of funny though, and if you don't think God has a sense of humor, you are really missing out. God communicates with me in so many different ways. Of course through His word. Also, through songs at the perfect time, through whisperings in my spirit, through the loving and encouraging words of friends and loved ones. Someone asked me once why I believed I was able to hear God speaking to me and they couldn't. My explanation was this: There are radio waves vibrating and floating through the air at all times. 24/7. We can't see them but they are there just the same. If your receiver is not on, you will be completely oblivious to the music, words and continuous broadcasts available to you at the touch of a button. God is like that. God is always "on the air." Is your receiver on? What station are you tuned into? This past week, I allowed the noise of fear, exhaustion, and hopelessness to drown out the music of protection, love, peace, healing and faith. It was there all along. I just needed to do some 'fine tuning.' God is available at all times. We just have to be willing to receive what He has to offer. I fell asleep one night praying to God saying "What am I doing wrong?" "Why aren't things getting better?" "What can I do?"  "God...is there anything I can DO?"

The next day I woke up with the chorus of a particularly annoying song stuck in my head. Just couldn't shake it. So aggravating! It was there all day like a mosquito in my ear. I'm so dense, I kept trying to push it away. Humming other songs, playing music on my iPhone, etc. But God is nothing if not persistent. That evening I was coming out of my room and I heard an urging deep down that said 'Just stop and LISTEN" And, you know what? I felt chills wash over me and tears came spilling down as in that moment, I finally got what He was so gently, yet persistently trying to tell me all day. Guess what the song was......an old Cheap Trick song I hadn't heard in years. You may know it. It goes a little something like this:
I WANT YOU TO WANT ME...I NEED YOU TO NEED ME...I LOVE YOU TO LOVE ME....you know the one. Wow. It fell over me like a crashing wave. That is the absolute only thing I have to offer God. Myself. Completely and totally surrendered and in loving acceptance and obedience to His will. Oh, how He loves me. How He loves us.

I may not be perfect but the God of Heaven and Earth calls me His own. As my Daddy used to remind me: "You are a living child of the living God. Your Father made this planet and it belongs to you." He also told me never to forget that. For a brief moment last week I lost touch with that. God's mercy drew me back in with (of all things, a) Cheap Trick and reminded me that He won't let go. Never, ever. Yes, God has a sense of humor. You know what else? He wants me to want Him. How cool is that? Can you see me grinning? :0)

Here's a video of a song that seems so appropriate to this post. Take a deep breath, crank it up and tune out the noise of the world. (And no, it's not Cheap Trick). Enjoy.





Blessings,
Cat

11 comments:

  1. Cat,
    Great testimony! I have to say that had you not waivered in your faith you wouldn't have anyting to say.
    We all waiver...I know I do and I have a tendency to do it in dramatic form. BUT GOD is always there to guide me back as He did you.
    You are a great sister and we love you. Keep sharing God's love and He will bless you always.

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  2. Thanks for this post, Cat. I think a lot of us have wallowed in that pit at one time or another - I know I have - recently, I must admit:)God's always having to remind me whose I am. Love the song!

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  3. Catherine, I understand what you are talking about when you speak of those with perfect faith. Two things come to mind. No one is perfect or has a perfect life but sometimes God will put things in front of you that you would like to have, just to see how you react when placed in front of those things....And then on the opposite end of the spectrum, God says to hold our heads high especially in the problem times. This may be what some of your friends do no matter what is going on in their life. I know this is what I do. No one would know unless I wanted them to that I was down in a valley....I never want to be the whiney I'm always needy kind, because God knows my needs. We must hold our heads up during those low times and know that God will get us through.

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  4. Tracy, You are wise woman with amazing faith. I've always tried to be one who keeps my head high during difficulty. I've been reminded through this experience that God will always meet us where we are. High or low. Whiney and needy or stoic and persevering. Either way, His grace is sufficient. I guess I want to tell other people out there that everyone stumbles and it's okay to 'keep it real' so to speak. You continue to inspire me and I love you. ~Cat

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  5. Nice job, Cathy! Love ME See you soon

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  6. Beautiful! Many times God's used an odd song to touch me. I happen to be a fan of Cheap Trick! :) Hope your family feels better soon.

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  7. I love this post!!! We all need those "Cheap Trick" God moments to keep us in check. I hope this next week everyone is feeling much better. Thanks for being my God moment today!!! I have to go fine tune my receiver. :) Love ya girly!!

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  8. Thanks, Cindy. Everyone is finally on the road to being well. It's going to be a very busy week trying to make up for lost time. Hope all is well with you and yours and you are ready for the upcoming adventure of a school year!

    Love u too!

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  9. Catherine :0) I have always known you to be nothing BUT honest and transparent - and it is such a blessing! You articulate what I believe every one of us goes through in a way that anyone can understand. God spoke to me this past week in the middle of a prayer through a text from a friend and brought me to tears. It's amazing what He says when we're listening! I love you so much and I've been praying for the health and healing of your sweet family. And I know He's bringing it (even if it's not as fast as any of us would like, lol) !! Thank you for another amazing testimony - blessings on you all!! ~ Amy H.

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  10. This was a timely post. I read it to my family and had tears in my eyes. I understood it perfectly.

    I had that happen to me with the Orleans song "Dance With Me". I went to the lyrics online and found someone else who had this to say:


    As I listened to the song today, I imagined it was God who wanted to dance with me. He wants to be my partner in life and He is better than any fantasy could be. He wants to dance with me and take me places I cannot go by myself and lift me off my feet. With every new day, the music starts and He is calling me to dance with Him. --Rhonda74

    I could not have said it better.

    This was a beautiful and timely post.

    ginger r. takamiya
    ChristianRomanceMagazine.com

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  11. Amy, Thanks so much. You know how much your friendship and soul-sisterhood means to me. Love you, too!

    Ginger, Thanks for stopping by. I loved your comment and will never listen to that song without remembering that God wants to dance with me daily! I can't wait to check out your website. It looks interesting. Thanks for the follow!
    ~Cat

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